Sunday, September 27, 2015

"I'm a Christian but I'm Like, You Know, Not Like Those Other Christians"

Donald R. McClarey at The American Catholic just posted two great video finds. The first is a "liberal" Christian video that has, I guess, been making the rounds. The second is a parody of it by the brilliant The Lutheran Satire, one of whose other videos we cited a few weeks ago.

You will choke on both of them. In a bad way on the first. In a good way on the second.

Let me declare my biases. People have called me a "hater". Okay, I'll bite. I hate "liberal" Christians. I despise them. Indeed, I strongly do not like them.


It's not because they interpret Christianity in a "liberal" manner. I may disagree with that--depending on how you define the term "liberal"--but it doesn't annoy me in any kind of existential way. You want to say (merely) that you're "gay and Christian". Okay, we can talk about it. I may think you're wrong about the Bible or Christian theology or, well, just how logic works, but I'm not going to say you're prima facie a bad man or woman or even that you necessarily have less dedication or faith than anyone else. Tell me about your faith. I will learn something.

That's not to say that your belief and practice (and mine) do not matter. They do, and they will have eternal consequences. But at base we're both fallible human beings. Like Adam. Like Peter. And a few others.

But most "liberal" Christians take it one step further. They denounce other Christians. They sneer at them and they judge them. And they do so primarily from the perspective that they alone are not judgmental. They alone are different. They alone are better.

It's the irony and hypocrisy that confounds.

Do you know any contemporary Catholics like that? Does it remind you of anyone?

Liberal Christians say that they are Christians. Fine. In that case . . .

Liberal Christians (most of them) are the most hubristic, hypocritical, pharisaical, nasty, vicious, dishonest Christians to have ever walked the face of the earth.

Which says a lot.

They would denounce their own brother as an Islamophobe if they thought it would earn them a point.

They have the  tolerance of Nazi brownshirts.

Yeah, I have a chip on my shoulder. And I know you get the idea.

So, here are the videos:

Please pray for me.

And the people I hate.


  1. This post proves two things to me.
    I admire you more than words can say.
    You and I are of the exact same mind.

    Great job!

    1. Thanks. I really appreciate that! And so you understand how cathartic it was to write that piece. My wife was feeling pretty down last night, but that muppet video made her break out into uncontrollable giggles. And the kids joined in. They like to see us laugh. In these serious times, laughter is often precisely what's needed.

    2. I heartily second Netmilsmom's comment. Thank you for this...Lutheran Satire is the BEST.

      And the liberal 'c'hristians you describe are the modern Christian version of judenrats.

  2. Was going to post something, but being an agnostic gay witch I realize I don't have a horse in this race.

    1. I respect that, Brian. We're saving a horse for you.

  3. I am confused by your post and your video (I only watched the first one).

    The disciples of Christ were ‘first called Christians in Antioch” (Acts 11). If anyone knows the back-story in Acts, those who adhered to the lifestyle and the teaching of Jesus (and by extension, the apostles who were going around Asia and Europe making converts from pagan faiths to Christian faith) – Christians because they had converted to the holy lifestyle required of Christians.

    The apostle Paul talks a lot about that, as does Jude, and Peter. And John. And the other gospel writers. I’d cite a variety of Biblical texts, but I suspect you know some of which I speak.

    So I am confused by your post and the video because you seem to be saying it doesn’t matter what one’s lifestyle is like. What matters is, are they a ‘Christian.’

    I suppose it depends on what one’s definition is of the word, Christian. Me? I go back to the New Testament for my definitions – and marching orders. Does that make me a ‘hater’? I suppose it depends on one’s definition of the word. Sometimes real Christian love has to be tough. And always honest.

    1. With respect, I think you missed the point. Watch the second video.

  4. Hey no fair !
    I was going to post this same Lutheran puppet satire - but Mahound beat me to it. Maybe I will anyway.

    I'm surprised you like anything Lutheran

    1. Hey, Andrew. I think I owe you an email. I hope all is well. No, actually I love that guy--pastor Hans Fiene I think is his name.

    2. Hey Hook---seriously Missouri and Wisconsin synod Lutherans are more Catholic than Francis, most cardinals and bishops these days.

      Even my former religion --S. Baptist---is more Catholic than Frank regarding faith and morals these days:

      Seattle kim

  5. Bwa ha ha! This most definitely couldn't have been made by ELCA Lutherans---the most predominant and liberal of all Lutheran branches. Gotta be Wisconsin synod Lutherans.

    Seattle Kim

  6. Looked it up: Missouri synod. Also a conservative branch of Lutheranism.

    Seattle kim