Friday, October 2, 2015

Pope: "God isn't a Magician. I am!"*

I don't know the origin of this, but it was featured on the Ellen Degeneres show. Time out on all political and religious differences. Thank you, Ms. Degeneres, for making my daughter laugh.

Next up, Pius IX solemnly declares what number an audience member is thinking of, Pius X causes heretics to disappear and Benedict XVI makes a beer stein materialize from under a handkerchief.

God will not be mocked. But some sources suggest He does have a sense of humor. That's lucky for Ellen. And for me. Though both of us may need a bit more than that . . .

* See "God is not a Magician with a Magic Wand," concerning miracles, evolution, etc.


  1. We should never joke about God. Yes, I know I sound like that crabby old Church Lady, but seriously - God is, like, God, ya know. And He does not have a sense of humour.
    Let them joke. We worship Him. This must be a trick video. Could even Francis have done this?

  2. I want to share a little ditty I've been composing with readers of Mahound. It's called:

    Yes We (in) CAN (tation)

    Hopery, changery, stranger-than-strangery
    tip the good vicar your hat -
    as he sits with Obama, the global Gautama
    (twin idols indulging in chat).

    Popery, popery, changery-hopery
    grant the old Pontiff his wish.
    Then summon a bishop to season and dish up
    a kettle of catechized fish.

    Changery, hopery - swing from the ropery,
    garnish the Vatican stew.
    The Cardinals compassed, the media rumpused
    the Protestants joined in, too...

    Fakery, changery, safety in dangery
    lack of direction was lost
    as it became clear that no concord was near
    and the threshold of lunacy crossed .

    Changery-hopery, soap-on-a-ropery,
    buy the Obama a beer.
    Let the Lord's liberation enlighten our nation
    and forums and quorums get queer.

    Hopery, changery, babe-in-a-mangery
    hail the immaculate mess;
    until limbo is purged and repentance is urged
    and the canonized con-men confess.

    Babilo-mockery, roll with the rockery
    kiss the pontificate ring;
    til' the old Argentinian wax Constantinian
    causing Gods angels to sing.

    Jiggery-pokery fooling the folkery
    monkery second to none...
    what was once sacrilegious is now a religious
    conventional focus of fun.

    Papacy, lunacy piping the tunacy
    Father goose mothered the egg -
    but it cracked in the nest while the stupefied West
    lit a match to a gunpowder keg.

    Yessiree/nopery - smoking the dopery
    opiates dulling the masses
    who bow genuflecting, with candles reflecting
    the shine of their Latinate asses.

    Fakery funkery, circus-time trunkery
    hierophants never forget
    but the pachyerm-trainer cut loose the restrainer
    augmenting the national debt.

    Piggery, smokery, tighten the chokery
    offer the refugees bacon;
    their mullahs may howl with a slaughterhouse scowl
    but the continent's free for the takin'...

    Bless me father for I have sinned...

    (Don't get hit by the Popemobile.)


  3. Should read "pachyDerm" in penultimate stanza.

    Sorry about that.